FIRST: When anyone hurts you, put "spiritual iodine" on the wound at once. That is, pray hard about it. If you do not do this it will fester.
SECOND: If resentment has hardened in your thoughts, apply grievance drainage. That is, open your mind and let the grievance flow out.
THIRD: Do this by unburdening yourself to a trusted counselor or write a letter to the person against whom you have the resentment. Then tear it up and while holding the pieces in your hand pray for the person and forgive them.
FOURTH: Become fully aware of the harm resentment can do to you, even to making you ill. Think of that whenever a hate thought comes.
FIFTH: Don't stop with forgiving a time or two. Do it, if necessary, seventy times seven---490 times to be literal.
SIXTH: Thinking about forgiving is not enough. You must come to a specific moment when you say "With God's help I now forgive."
SEVENTH: Repeat the Lord's Prayer inserting your offender's name, "Forgive me my trespasses as I forgive..........."
EIGHTH: Pray for the other person, asking specific blessings for them, especially concerning matters which have previously annoyed you the most.
NINTH: Speak in a kindly and complimentary manner and as often as possible about the person against whom you harbor antagonism.
TENTH: Make a sincere study of the personality factors which created an unhappy relationship so that the "mistake pattern" in yourself may not recur.
Yeremiah Hardt
yeremiah@aol.com
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